The Global Mess
Lets face it, despite our brilliance in certain areas, we humans have made a mess; one wonders how we can have been so stupid in the big picture. (Lack of holistic thinking) As men we men played a major role in creating this mess due to our conditioning which will be discussed in more detail later in this booklet.
Masculinity was previously conveyed to boys by the elders in the tribe/village. Today’s media portrays a confusing range regarding masculinity and thus my booklets aim to clarify the subject while validating the many different types of men and masculinities.
Therefore when I use the term men, I’m recognizing a huge diversity or continuum within the gender. Some of my statements may be relevant to one end of that continuum and not apply to you. However myths are powerful; they shape societies, set behavioural norms and impact all men in some way.
The dominant “tough man” myth still lingers today; it is a very powerful and ancient myth, filled with irrational dogma. Most men and boys I’ve worked with said they never measured up to this impossible standard. It is an outmoded myth and quite dangerous for men and those they love. Therefore I encourage you to be authentic. Do what it takes to become your true self regardless of where you fit on the ’male scale.’
Mess Cleaning —Opportunity for positive action!
Since many men like action, a phenomenon exists that just might be our saving grace. When we men clean up our messes, we embody a level of consciousness different to the one we had when we made the original mess. Remember Einstein saying, “One can’t solve a problem with the same level of consciousness that created it.”
Mess cleaning creates an opportunity to grow bigger and step up into certain positive character qualities. Positive change begins the moment we engage in cleaning up our messes. Sadly our socialization as men ensures that we have made plenty; especially relationship messes.
If we have told lies, cheated, stolen or profited unfairly from certain behaviours, that weighs heavily on our soul and I believe will ultimately harm our health. But that was in the past, so today, with your new consciousness and intention, get on the phone and begin making amends.
Reclaiming Integrity
Integrity is crucial for the cleaning up process; our integrity may have been off when we made the mess but we can enter this next stage with new and clear integrity. (What a relief!) I’ll discuss this complex topic in future handbooks, suffice to say now that we cannot become an authentic being while our integrity is off; it will always come back to harm us greatly not to mention all those connected to us.
You could make a mess list today and begin to make things right; sometimes it can be as simple as an explanation and/or an apology.
Mess cleaning is a good starting place for many men embracing change. It is action learning, it is action change, it can be started today and it is a concrete step towards growing ourselves.
• Our consciousness shifts the moment we decide to mess-clean
• We grow during the process – growth is significant and lasting
• Many men like action —this is positive change action
• The rewards are greater than we can imagine
• Cleaning up our messes locally contributes to peace globally
• No man who does this work wants to go back to the old ways
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